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Endings or Disguised Beginnings?

November 17, 2015

My friend Natalie and I caught up on the phone last week, the bulk of our conversation about the people we know currently going through a change, whether a job, relationship or even moving.

“This seems to be the year of endings,” said Natalie, who then named six people she knows who are divorcing, their ages ranging from 25 to 65. “Either they jumped in too soon or-”

“They finally had enough,” I finished her sentence for her.

Whether you’re dealing with the end of a relationship, a career, or even just making a shift in your life, though the process can be daunting, there’s a catch to endings: they’re also a chance for new beginnings. A chance to start over, to do it right, or simply try something new.

That doesn’t make change any less scary. Many avoid it, fearful they’ll never find another partner or job or (fill in the blank). So they remain in a situation “that’s okay, not great.” But what if you knew that as hard as it was to take that leap, you were guaranteed a soft landing? Would you then jump without a second thought?

Years ago I made that leap. Truthfully, I was pushed. I’d been living in a two-bedroom with my Uncle Mark in the Bronx when he (lovingly) told me it was time we lived on our own. So I chose to move into a shoebox. Friends and family told me I was nuts. At first I wasn’t sure they were wrong. Not only was I living in a space slightly larger than most people’s walk-in closets, but I quit my high-paying job so I could finish writing my first book, leaving me solely responsible for my own health coverage, not to mention, living alone in New York City.

Turns out, it was one of the best decisions I ever made.

Any significant change may appear out of reach, but often it’s not. Journeys begin with one simple step. Then another. And another. And even if you never reach the destination, at least you tried. Which is really what the journey is all about.


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  1. True. I think Marilyn Monroe once said, “Good things fal apart so that better things can come together.”

    • Deanna Rutherford-Blowes permalink

      I actually have her quote on my wall. 🙂

  2. Marilyn Solomon permalink

    You are one terrific young woman! Hugs 😍

  3. Tracey permalink

    Hi Felice, As always, I love reading your articles! True–change is scary. When I decided to move from NYC to LA a year ago, I didn’t tell anyone until I started shipping things (or afterwards). It was an emotional and tough decision but I, myself, couldn’t even think too deeply about it. I knew I needed a change and to live in a warmer climate. One year later…things here are starting to fall into place and I feel like “my feet are now on the ground”…but it wasn’t easy at first…it’s still not easy. Anyway, great article 🙂 Step by is a journey…yes, one has to take a chance and make the first step…

  4. Tom Olverson permalink

    Felice, I think that if you believe enough in something life-affirming, just the journey will make things better. As always, you make me pause and think about what is truly important!

  5. Richard Aberson permalink

    Sure helps to be gutsy, daring, intelligent and pretty like you.

  6. Deanna Rutherford-Blowes permalink

    Just the words my husband & I need as we embark on better exercise & eating habits.

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